So since last time I really wrote, some crazy shit has gone down. Work has been really fun and this past week the high jinx were never higher or jinxier!
Exciting drama at the beginning of the week followed by days filled with laughing and rocking out.
Let me see, the last night I worked was Thursday night and that was pretty chill. We weren't that busy, but i really wasn't feeling well at the beginning of the night so that was alright. Thursday was open mic and I was curious about various factors of how that would be. Who would be there? Would they be cool? I still had these two dudes who were drinking coffees forever so I had to hang out. That's the biz, I guess. Finally, the band start playing and everything was cool. The dudes left and then I left for a second only to come back and find that the place had almost completely cleared out. It was really surreal. Like I'm thinking for a second, wondering if I somehow lost track of an hour. It was really Twilight Zone like. But my one pain in the ass friend was there and that kind of started to make things suck. I feel bad for the dude because he's pretty much fucked for life, but still. So that was a bag of suck. Still though I was working with cool people and that made closing fun and efficient.
The next day I just emailed people and then went to get my tire fixed. I had been rolling my fullsize spare since I got back from NY in early August. It only cost fifteen bucks to patch it up. I should have done it sooner. Then I went and picked up Ryan and Jess to go to Baltimore. This was really fun because traffic was really messed up in our entire area. There was this armed robbery/ high speed chase/ shootout with the cops that had the highways shut down. This meant that every light in the entire area; Lemoyne, Camp Hill, Mechanicsburg had what Seth Charles would call "stacking".
I'm not being sarcastic when I say that it was fun though. Where I live traffic isn't typically bad at all really ever, so when it is suddenly really bad, you get to go into crazy cabbie mode and use all of your little tricks and shortcuts. We bypassed all of Market St. in Camp Hill by going up into the quiet neighborhoods. Then I came over the hill right by where my Grandma used to live. Hell Yeah! We went from the bypass to 17th st. in like five minutes. Jess has one of those tapes that you can put in your tapedeck to play your iPod, so we were cranking tunes the whole time. I've got to get one of those. I never looked into car iPod accessories because I always thought you had to tune in with your radio, which I've seen be troublesome.
Luckily the highway we had to take to Baltimore was open and traffic was fine. I think we got to Baltimore in an hour flat thanks to me being one of America's 50 most solid road drivers. Ryan drove back and we made it back really fast too. We listened to Werewolves and Lollipops and those two loved it. We continued the party back at Ryan's until about 4:30. Then I came home made a pizza, didn't eat it and passed out. Great night!!!!!
Today I woke up sort of early. I called Ryan and went over there. I guess it's the season but we've been watching a lot of horror movies lately. The Exorcist was the last one and I think Jess liked it, but Ryan and I having only seen the rerelease, were miffed at the lack of crabwalk. I've been watching horror on my own too. I've started Friday the 13th part 6 like four times, but never finish it. That movies is, uh not so good, but today the three of us watched the worst movie ever made in any genre. Leprachaun In The Hood.
This movie is an affront to everybody alive. Ice T is in it, Ryan said he loves the Leprechaun movies, it was raining like a bitch, so we were like "OK, let's check it out." Damn. I had never seen any movie from the series, so I didn't know that the Leprechaun could be turned to stone by his little amulet. Twice in the movie at key times, it's placed on his neck by somehow blowing up into the air, spreading out and landing perfectly around his neck. I don't think anyone could do that if they tried, let alone once in Harlem and then later in South Central. I didn't know where the heck the first scene took place (where a dude gets his afro pick jammed in his neck) but I just found an online script (Ryan will be psyched!)!!!!! http://www.lepconnie.com/scriptlep5.html. Anyway, then Ice T's character blasts the Leprechaun with steam instead of giving him back his magic flute and the steam blows the amulet up into the air and it falls around his neck and he turns into wood. Then Mack Daddy, Ice T's character moves to Compton or wherever and starts his own rap label.
Long story short! Postmaster P and his boys Stray Bullet and Butch are a rap group. They are all about the postive message, but when Mack Daddy won't give them a record deal they decide to rob his place and trash it. This is how the Leprechaun gets free. They piss off Mack Daddy. Leprechaun is after them because they steal his flute away from Mack Daddy. They try to pawn a guitar to afford new equipment and when they can't they just throw it in a dumpster. Leprechaun breaks Ice T's right index finger off yet he still shoots a gun with that hand for the rest of the movie. The DJ for the rap group knows all this chemistry shit and at one point set the Leprechaun on fire by mixing douche and toothpaste on a towel and then hooking it up to electricity. He gets fucked up from that but somehow magically heals. Every single black stereotype ever is highlighted and the heroes, after reading Leprechauns For Dummies, dress as hoes to get the Leprechaun to smoke a joint with them that has four leaf clovers in it.
At one point a cross dressing dude named Fontaine even tries to seduce the Leprechaun and gets killed! When they smoke the joint with the clovers it makes the Lep pass out and they steal the flute back. They need to flute to make people like their rap songs. Mack Daddy's shows up and kills Butch and then they do whatever leads the amulet to go up into the air and come down on Leprechaun's neck. But Postmaster P made some kind of deal with him so it cuts to him on a stage in Vegas where he's rapping and the crowd loves him even though he's just repeating the same dumbass rhyme over and over. Then it cuts to the side of the stage and the Leprechaun is there so you know he's ruling shit. Then Leprechaun raps, then his zombie fly girls sing a reeeeeeeeaaaaaaaally uncomfortably stupid song and the movie's over.
I think throughout the movie we all looked at each other like, "What?" about two hundred times. Some scenes were just downright terrible where others you could tell were intentionally funny and OK. Early in the movie Mack Daddy pulls a switchblade, then a small baseball bat out of his fro. That sets you up for a comedy, but there was really no other funny stuff for pretty much the whole movie. It was ridiculous!!!
Anyway, then I watched some of Shaun of The Dead and that made up for how sucky the previous movie was.
Damn, we've been listening to this a ton at work and it's killing. MGMT - Electric Feel
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gJXar_27tWQ (can't embed? C'mon MGMT!!)
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